Anonymous said: that gifset you just reblogged reminded me of this bell hooks quote: "The first act of violence that patriarchy demands of males is not violence toward women. Instead patriarchy demands of all males that they engage in acts of psychic self-mutilation, that they kill off the emotional parts of themselves. If an individual is not successful in emotionally crippling himself, he can count on patriarchal men to enact rituals of power that will assault his self-esteem."
As a sex worker who deals with, ‘mental mindfucks’ yeah, there are men who are married for decades and they want a humiliating scenario and next thing I know they are crying saying shit like ‘I just wanna wear earrings…’ just breaking down, their gender in question, their whole life in question, that pressure of a life lost because they wanted to change and fit into what they felt they should be doing, rather than just accepting who they are and what they like… or they are in the fetal position on the floor weeping over a childhood trauma… and they don’t talk about it, with anyone, wife, guy friends, no one wants to hear it, so they have to sexualize it in order to be okay with it because men are allowed to be sexual monsters, but they aren’t allowed to emotional adults and deal with this in a healthy way.
It’s fucked up dude
Go and read the article
I’ve been trying to find a way to put this into words. I’m glad someone managed to.
Inspired of course by by Joanna Russ. And not set off by anything in particular, just an aggregate of comments and a good friend being treated terribly for posting some of her fiction for free online.She tweets and tumblrs so she must not be working.She never tweets…
While there is a lot of appropriate rage about Ferguson right now, the killing of John Crawford, III is getting less attention than it deserves. I put Shaun King’s tweets and history lesson on the matter in chronological order for easier consumption.
You really should be following Shaun King on Twitter.
"There is this devaluation of women."
Jeremy the Garbage Boy.
This is what Jeremy is doing now. He’s the garbage boy in the city of Circle Squirrel.
It’s almost time for SPX, so I’m reblogging this from last year.
I took a lot of flack last year for the bit about how you can throw away things people give you for free. I stand by it and in fact I have doubled down on it in the face of criticism. BE NICE and GRACIOUS when someone gives you something, thank them sincerely. That’s the only thing they’ll know or remember. If you don’t like it or don’t want it, they won’t see you tossing it in the recycling bin later. I promise they won’t know.
The stuff about social anxiety and panicking is really important, too. My anxiety has me a bit more jumpy than usual lately, and I’m fully prepared to take little breaks where I go someplace quiet for a few minutes. I’ve decided to reframe “being anti-social because I don’t want to see people” as “exercising self-care because I want to be calm enough to enjoy low-key friendship times.” Same behavior, just a new context that removes the guilt and shame component. It turns out there’s no moral imperative to spend time in loud, crowded rooms!
Another tip: try to get your friends’ phone numbers ahead of time so you can text them to make plans, if possible. A little emailing now saves a lot of “where u guys at” tweets this weekend.
I love you all, I love SPX, see many of you soon!
Hi everyone. I’m in pre-SPX anxiety mode (known in my journal as “StressPX”) and Rich basically dared me to write this, so.
Advice for First-Time Exhibitors at SPX!
I’ve been coming to SPX since 2005, and exhibiting since 2006. Here are a few tips, many of which may seem obvious, but some of…
|You have to make records for yourself. That sounds selfish, but it’s a paradox. By making records for yourself, you’re being not selfish. It means you’re not trying to make records for the whole world, and the record will be better because of that. I see people to this day complaining about how they keep sending stuff out and banging their heads against the wall and not getting anywhere, and it’s because they’re trying too hard. We don’t try too hard.|
|Mitchell:||We don’t even try.|
|Pollard:||We try not to try. That should be our motto.|